Do you Engage in this Losing Battle? (Spoiler alert...we all do!)
Apr 26, 2021
I think that we would likely all agree that the act of arguing with reality is a fruitless pursuit. But when we really stop and observe the inner dialogue going on inside our brains throughout much of the day, we may discover that we are actually giving away quite a bit of time and energy to doing just that.
How do you recognize if you are arguing with reality? These dialogues usually start with phrases such as:
'I wish this wasn't...'
'this shouldn't be...'
'this should be...'
'if only this were...'
'if only this hadn't...'
'it would be so much easier if...'
These phrases indicate that there is a lack of acceptance of what IS or ISN'T. Why is this a problem?
Well, in addition to the fact that these thoughts don't change the facts, these phrases direct our brains to focus on the lack, or the discrepancy between a desired and an actual state. And from there we tend not to take productive action that will move the needle closer to something we do want.
What if instead, we chose to utter the following:
'Given that this is, how can I find the best way forward?'
'How can I be a creative solution-finder in the face of this'
'What are some new ways that I can see this as happening for me instead of to me, and how can I impress myself with my ingenuity in tackling this?'
'This isn't supposed to be easy because growth and transformation always come from the hard things, so let me find how I can grow into a more evolved version of myself through this'
For me reading the first makes me feel powerless and deflated, whereas when I read the second set I feel empowered and energized.
How about for you? How does it feel to read this second set of phrases compared to the first set? Do you notice a difference?
Do You Want to Feel Better?
Get inspiration and actionable tips for a better life delivered to your inbox
We hate SPAM. We will never sell your information, for any reason.
