Having Fun with Personal Growth: Something to Try when Attempting Change
Apr 26, 2021
Sometimes it can feel quite difficult to change the way we show up when we are in the habit of showing up in some other way. Even though we know rationally that at any moment we can choose a new way of thinking that allows us to show up in a new way, we can feel as if there is almost a physical barrier keeping us from that just by nature of the number of times we have repeated the old way before.
There are various approaches to creating change in our thoughts and ultimately in how we behave in the world. An approach I want to tell you about is one that I find useful and that also has an element of fun and whimsy. Imagine you are an actress playing the role of a woman in a movie--that woman is the ideal version of you.
So, in that mode, the next time a situation comes up where you might typically react with a thought that leads you to, say, feel frustrated and then yell at your kids, you will instead be responding in character—the character that you are playing in your secret movie. That character chooses thoughts about the situation that leads her to feel in control and to respond in a calm and collected manner.
And the secret part—that’s part of the fun. Your kids, your spouse, your work colleagues, your internet customer support agent with whom you are on the phone, none of them know that you are actually deep into your method-acting experiment. They may be perplexed as to why you are suddenly so much more patient with their complaints about doing chores, less defensive when given some ‘constructive feedback’, etc.
Do you think that this is an experiment you might want to try? Do you think that it could help you feel less inhibited by your ‘old ways’ and allow you to practice showing up differently in the course of your life?
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